The local elections here in Crawley generated a few surprises, but little of the nail-biting excitement we are used to here. Anyone in need of entertainment at the count had to rely on a speech by Arshad Khan of the Justice party.
Arshad is well-known within the town, and nothing he can says or does can really surprise us now, so this is really for the benefit of my out-of-town readers.
I don’t think I can put it any better than the Crawley Observer did this week in their carefully-worded report:
The party founder (and sole member) gave a rousing talk in which he shared his alleged past triumphs and visions of the future.
Note the word “alleged”. One of Mr. Khan’s most frequent claims is that he single-handedly brought peace to Northern Ireland. His visions for the future usually involve criminals working in the sewers, lethal injections, and sending immigrants home.
The Bewbush taxi driver said “The Justice party could have won if I had delivered leaflets to every house in Bewbush.”
Hmm. I don’t think he would win if he delivered twenty pound notes to every house in Bewbush. Arshad actually got a respectable 92 votes, which implies, by his logic, that he delivered 91 leaflets then voted for himself. But don’t go away – the best bit is coming up.
He continued: “Blair is going to resign next week and when he does he is going to take credit for bringing peace to Northern Ireland. When this happens the media will jump on him and say ‘no it was the taxi driver from Bewbush’ “
I have been keeping an eye on the news today. So far this has not happened…
He said: “There will be a general election in the coming weeks when the Justice party will go on to run the country. The Justice party is the future; everyone else is the past, long live Crawley, long live the Justice party, long live England.”
His plans are getting bigger. At the last general election count he predicted that our MP would resign within six months and he would win the by election unopposed as all the parties would stand aside for him. So far this has not happened either…
I would love to see how a party with one member is going to contest enough seats to win in a general election, but I am sure he has a cunning plan and expects all the other parties to stand aside again.
As he built to a shouting crescendo someone behind the scenes cut him off by unplugging his microphone. He eventually left the stage chanting “long live England”.
Is it just me or does that word “eventually” conjure images of manhandling?
And to think that Crawley has a reputation in some quarters of being boring.
I once had a reasonable conversation about politics with Arshad Khan. He was logical, relaxed and didn’t say anything deluded at all.
Mind you, that doesn’t make up for all the other conversations, or the letters.
And I had been drinking that night
The law of averages says that he must have the odd lucid moment.
I got in his taxi once… its my claim to fame.
The Electoral Commission website suggests that there may be more than one person in his party – see http://www.electoralcommission.org.uk/regulatory-issues/regpoliticalparties.cfm?frmGB=1&frmPartyID=221&frmType=partydetail
Well, he could have two more members, or he could have just got family/friends to sign up so he could register.
I bet Richard Symond’s son has helped him deliver leaflets, but that doesn’t make him part of a mass political movement, does it?
It may well be that you have to list a treasurer and nominating officer to get official registration – no guarantee that they are members of the party. Come to think of it, I wonder if they know they have been listed 🙂 They may have agreed to make him go away…
The other thing is that the registration was in 2001. A lot can change in 6 years, as we know only too well.
It is worth following the link to their accounts and the previous year’s was even better.
One thing confuses me though, and it is the line which says “Is Minor Party? No”
Does that mean it is a major party? Or that it does not reach some threshold to be even a minor party?
And another thing… they have a campaigns officer???
That is the best set of accounts I have ever read.
Hang on… Surely if the Justice Party declared any election expenses for 2004, the accounts can be challenged, on the basis that it spent money which is undeclared.
Danivon says : “I bet Richard Symonds’ son has helped him deliver leaflets…”
The agent of Richard Symonds says : “There were no leaflets for Richard Symonds’ son to deliver, and only one door was knocked upon – his own – when he locked himself out.”
Danivon – Why would anyone bother to challenge the Justice party’s accounts?
Richard – interesting. Your vote is very good for an indy if there was no door-knocking or leaflets, Must be a hardcore of 50 or 60 RWS voters out there.
Mind you… I have seen some of your old publicity. Maybe it was a wise move 😉
The agent of Richard Symonds does wonder how many votes he would actually receive in Ifield, if he really decided to ‘put his back into it’ to win – instead of just standing as a counter to the BNP.
Richard, are you telling me that you’ve had no assistance whatsoever from the junior Symonds for any of your election campaigns?
If not, I think perhaps you should consider it. Character building if nothing else.
Do I detect a bit of sarcasm in your comment, Danivon ?