In the Crawley Observer today there was a sort of advert for a sort of job.   Not really a job, because no payment is mentioned, more of a task.  All I know is that I certainly couldn’t do it – reviewing local concerts for their online reviews section.It sounds like it should tempt me: an excuse to go out and see live music and then get my views on it read by more than the handful who read what I write here.   Having seen, and enjoyed, a few of the local bands last month I imagine this would involve lots of pleasant surprises, so whats wrong with it?

Well, I just wouldn’t be able to cope with it if a band were poor or even terrible.  I’m quite happy to slag off Westlife or Celine Dion for several reasons: everyone else does, they won’t ever read what I write, they are well-compensated for any criticism they get, and they deserve it.

Local bands though…  they could doing it for fun rather than money, maybe even putting themselves out of pocket to play.  They could be starting off and have a fragile confidence that could be shattered even by a local paper’s online review.  They could easily take any sort of criticism personally and I would feel rotten. ((And they could easily find out where I live and come round to beat me up…))

I would just not be able to forget that they are real people with real egos, so if they were playing awful songs out of tune I would still be desperately trying to leap on whatever positives I could find and that would end up either patronising in the extreme or just damning with faint praise.

But if anybody else fancies a crack at it they can apply by writing to alexandra.jenkins@sussexnewspapers.co.uk saying why they would be so much more suitable than me.  It is not limited to the Crawley/Horsham area either – could be Haywards Heath, Brighton or elsewhere in the county.