Yesterday I finished Robert Rankin’s latest book, Retromancer, which hits the shops on December 17th.   Just in time to be the ideal Christmas present for any Rankin fan.  My uncorrected manuscript proof (thanks Sis!) let me get ahead of the crowd, although at the expense of missing out on the illustrations – I may have to browse the real thing in the bookshops to see them: my copy just had lots of “Insert illustration here” placeholders.  Not complaining though.

The book is a follow up to the Brightonomicon, featuring and mentioning various characters, institutions, and running jokes from that book and many other previous books right the way back to the original Brentford Trilogy books.   As such it is is probably not the best place for a newcomer to start, although the book does stand on its own.  It is just so much more rewarding to read when you have all that behind you.

The story is as preposterous as you would expect from Rankin.  After the events of the Brightonomicon, Rizla returns to being Jim Pooley in 1960’s Brentford, except it is a Brentford where the street signs are in German and English, where swastikas fly in the streets, and Bratwurst is served in the Wife’s Legs Cafe because it is a world where Germany won the Second World War after nuking the USA.

It takes Pooley no time at all to get on the wrong side of the local SS and everything looks bleak when suddenly he finds himself transported to wartime Britain to once again become Rizla, team up with Hugo Rune and make sure the war ends up how it should, whilst avoiding paying for any meals, drinks or taxi fares.

Along the way there are pirates, Count Otto Black, the Ministry of Serendipity, and much wielding of the now legendary stout stick.  We find out how Fangio came to be Lazlo Woodbine’s favourite barman,  how Winston Churchill didn’t exist and the truth about Bletchley Park.

Far-fetched fiction has never been more far-fetched or enjoyable.  It will go well with a foaming pint of Comic Sans.