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Personally I am just tired of the reading out of stories written by the pre-teen versions of C&H.  Unfortunately they seem to enjoy them and will probably continue, but it is a finite supply they have and it will run out soon, so I’ll just ride the wave.

Having said that, I quite enjoyed the version of the story The Thriling Three that Richard did on his other podcast, but that was more for the acting and business around it.

The disappointment was really that the whole thing felt a bit flat.  The last time they went to Brighton was one of mah favourite podcasts and I was hoping this one would be another high point but, for me, the reading out of old stories and the 70s paper version of the profanity app took up far too much of the time.

It was good to see the secret dancing demonstration though, in fact I thought Andrew Collins did very well on his own for somebody who is not a natural live performer.  He is actually a lot better looking in real life too.  Most photos I have seen of him are ones taken from a crappy webcam on his laptop.  It is quaint in a way, how he has to wave a laptop around to take a photo.  Maybe I should have taken the opportunity in the Q&A session to ask if he has heard of normal digital cameras…

It was not a bad night out. At one point I really was crying with laughter – unfortunately at the bit you really should laugh at. So not bad – just nowhere near as good as I had hoped it would be.

Part of the problem may be overfamiliarity as a result of following both twitter feeds, having both blogs on my RSS reader, and listening to both podcasts – sometimes you hear things that you have already encountered in several stages of development over the past week – but more often it means you get lots of interplay between them and references that would otherwise go over your head so in most cases it is positive.

I guess it was just my bad luck that one of the few episodes of the podcast that didn’t do it for me was one fo the few live ones and the only one I have been to.

I think he has a point though: the Argus has a poll attached to that story (Is Reverend Archie Coates right to repeat the description of Brighton as “Godless”?) and the results at the moment are:

• yes, and it’s good he intends to help change this: 3%
  
• no, it has its troubles but it is generally a good place:  2%
• being described as Godless is a compliment: 95%

Looks like the people of Brighton respond to accusations of being godless the way they would respond to accusations of being gorgeous or intelligent

Ironically, if you were to trust online polls (which is probably not a wise thing to do as a rule) Brighton is marginally less godless than the national average.  This is going by a poll on the Alpha website.  On this site they have a poll which just says “Does God exist?”  The results are:

• Yes:  2%
  
• No:  97%
  
• Probably:  1%

Mind you, I have not discounted an organised mischievous campaign by those pesky atheists to frig the result by going there to vote no.  Even so, it must be right.  If God did exist then he would have a vote, and his vote would be like the old union block votes at Labour conferences and outweight all the others.  So either he does not exist or he abstained, and I know which option I am inclined towards.

The floor of the hall immediately after the end of the conference

The last day of conference is a funny one.  It is only a half-day for a start.  I imagine the original reason for that is so that delegates and others can stand a chance of getting home afterwards if they live at the other end of the country.

That does still apply, of course, for delegates and organisers who have a committment to be at the whole thing.  Other more casual visitors often decide that the extra night in whichever town is not worth it for half a day, especially when the main event (the leader’s speech) has already been and gone.  People with jobs will also wonder about taking an extra day off their holiday entitlement for half a day.

Consequently the place is a hell of a lot quieter.  fewer people around and there were even a couple of satellite uplink vans fewer than the day before.

To counteract this, the upstairs balcony is closed off so that the people who remian are not too spread out, also members of local parties are encouraged to come along for the day by getting free admission on the last day.  I think it is a shame because the atmosphere is really good – like the last day of term when you were at school.

It is also a shame because there were some good speeches made on the last day – the deputy leader obviously, but also some fine contributions from David Milliband and Douglas Alexander.

Crawley MP, Laura Moffatt, being interviewed for the TV

I turned up a bit later, missing the fisrst session, which I think was the Northern Ireland report, but did enjoy the Britain in the World report and the emergency resolutions: one about the East Coast Mainline and one about the Sri Lankan Tamils, both of which were overwhelmingly accepted.

I had to pay a visit to the gents, and while I was out of the hall decided to pop out for a quick smoke. The first thing I saw when I got out there was my own MP being interviewed for some TV programme or other.

When i got back in I joined the rest of the Crawley crowd – there were about half a dozen of us together, plus a couple more who were about to appear on stage for some reason or other.  I think they were supposed to represent the wide variety of people that the party supports as there were quite a few in diferent work clothes.  Our two were there as either pensioners or veterans or both.

I thought that the Alexander and Milliband speeches were very good.  They followed the normal template of having at least half the content directly related to their own portfolio, but still leaving space to repeat a few things about the overall policies, the dangers of a Tory government and how the election is till there to be won.

I had been bothered about the amount of repetition until I had a flash or two of the blindingly obvious.  First of all I remembered from various communication exercises at work that you really can’t tell people the same thing too often.  Say something once and it might get missed, but those who don’t miss it will forget it – you have to keep re-inforcing the message to make it stick.  Secondlt, I had been worried that we keep making the same few specific criticisms of the Tories.  There must be more to criticise than their opinion that the best way to tackle a meltdown of the banking system is to sit back and hope it all works itself out and their intention to prioritise giving out huge tax breaks to the 3000 richest estates.

Harriet Harman, wearing her deputy leader hat for the closing speech

OK, there were more things than that mentioned, but these two were always mentioned by every official speaker. Then I realised – the inheritabce tax is the only Tory party policy we can really lay into because it is the only specific policy they have.  Their reaction to the global recession is just about the only time they have really said specifically what they would do and it was wrongity-wrong.

No wonder they have kept so quiet about specifics, because they do not do themselves any favours when they do: tax cuts for the very rich and bringing back fox hunting is just about all they have really come up with so far.

As normal, the event ended with the singing of The Red Flag and Jerusalem.  Having not been raised in a socialist family, steeped in tradition, and although I am staunchly atheist, I am a lot more familiar with the words to Jerusalem, which I think is a terrific song despite being a hymn.  Of course my familiarity may be more to do with the fact that ELP did a version of it on their Brain Salad Surgery LP…

Once the official events had concluded I went a few blocks along to a restaurant where Laura was hosting a lunch for the Crawley members who were there, plus some PPCs from surrounding constituencies.  I qualified on both counts so maybe I should have had two meals

The post-conference lunch

It was a very pleasant way to end the week, and many thanks to Laura for doing that. Not only was it a good meal in good company but it was also a chance to take some photos without having to rely on the long lens.  Not only that, the absence of press photographers meant that, at last, I had the biggest camera in the building.  A welcome situation after five days of relentless camera-envy as the media wandered around everywhere with their cameras of cartoon proportions.

Even better: it was another sunny day, so afterwards I walked back along the beach and tried out my new circular polarizing filter.  Having a new toy to play with made up for me forgetting my mp3 player and having to endure everybody else’s mobile phone calls on the train journey there and back.

Looking back at the week, I am really glad to have gone.  I think it was under the best circumstances too – being able to go back home each day.  I think that staying in the host city you could end up spending far too much time getting wasted in the pubs just to pass the time.

I am sure there was a bit of stage management going on, but not as much as a cynic might have expected.  yes it was suspicious that so many of the people called from the floor to speak had their speeches all ready, almost as if they knew they were going to be called and it was suspicious that so many of those called just happened to be PPCs that needed the publicity or trade union bosses or NPF members, and that a couple of speeches sounded like they could have been written by party HQ – but then again, quite a few people called from the floor were gloriously off-topic, off-message or both.  In a way it was a bit of a disappointment to find that all the accusations of the party being manipulative masters of spin and control-freakery were not true.  As a candidate I had no messages telling me what to do, what to say or what to think.

Conclusion: go to a party conference if you get the chance, but only go as an official delegate if you don’t mind having to do a lot of extra work – I saw them all assiduously taking notes, and heading off for policy seminars while the rest of us were swanning off to fringe meetings. On the plus side, delegates get their admission, travel accommodation and subsistance paid for by the body that sends them – but I think the £200 it cost me to get a pass and to get a train each day was a small price to pay for not having to do all that work.

Do go to as many fringe meetings as you can too and go to a variety of them.  You may be overwhelmingly concerned about health or education or housing but don’t just go to meetings about your favourite obsession: get out of your comfort zone and have your eyes opened.  Some of the events are a great chance to see some really big names in really small rooms, where you have a lot more chance of getting a question in than you do when the same people are on the platform in the main hall.

The top tip is take a carrier bag.  You will soon get swamped with papers – the conference newspaper, daily report from the organising committee, flyers and pamphlets thrust at you all the time, not to mention all the stuff you might pick up from stands at the exhibitions or handouts at fringe meetings.

Fortunately quite a few of the exhibition stands were giving away re-usable shopping bags alongside the traditional pens and badges – so make that your first stop.

Every year I hear reports from conference delegates at my constituency meetings and they always say the same thing – how great it was and how inspiring it was and how everyone should go to renew their faith in the party and its ideals.  I always took it with a pinch of salt, but swipe me it turns out they were all right.  I made new friends, caught up with old ones and generally had a brilliant time.

A sign on the footbridge between the Grand and the Hilton at Labour's conference.

Following Tuesday’s over-long day, when I was in Brighton from 0800 to 2300 I took it a bit easier today and caught a later train.  Actually a bit later than intended: Jayne was a bit unwell and waiting for the doctor to call back so no lift to the station – I had to walk the mile to the shops and wait for a bus instead, but I did get to Brighton before lunchtime.I didn’t actuall catch any of the morning sessions at the conference proper, but was in good time for a fringe event held by the European Parliamentary Labour Party about why workers in Europe are turning to the right. I went because I was interested in the topic, but it turned out to be the holy grail for anyone seeking decent food.

The event had tables instead of rows of chairs, so I was able to sit down with a plate of sandwiches, lamb samosa , deep-fried camembert and breaded chicken things, washed down with orange juice and followed by a fruit tart and decent coffee.  Result!  It was especially good to be able to enjoy it without trying to balance a plate on my lap while worrying about a glass on the floor.

In fact I had rather more time to enjoy it than I wanted.  The event kicked off really late because some speakers were held up by a vote in the main hall, but the time passsed pleasantly in conversation with a chap visiting from Wimbledon.  Amongst other things he told me about his octogenerian mother who called him yesterday to say that after a lifetime of voting Tory she would be voting for Gordon Brown.  Actually it was a bit stronger than that: she said she was determined to cling on long enough to be around to vote Labour for the first time ever next year.

I have heard a few similar bits of anectodal evidence that we are still picking up voters despite what the Sun might think.

The meeting eventually started and it was interesting enough, but not entirely on-topic.  A lot was said about the BNP, the ‘no platform’ policy and so on, but it was mostly about Britain and not Europe.  It started well with the man from the GMB keeping it European, but after that it was Emily Thornberry talking about her experiences in Islington and Searchlight talking about the BNP.  Glenis Wilmot did try and get it back to Europe, as you would expect.

I hoped that somebody would talk more about the need to encourage and foster solidarity between workers in different European countries, although the GMB man, whose name escapes me did touch on that.

I ducked out a little bit early, during the questions at the end, and went back over to the Brighton Centre to get my photo taken with Harriet Harman, and then went into the main hall to see what was going on.

The two Eds - Balls and Izzard - at conference in Brighton

I was just in time for the education debate, which I really enjoyed.

Ed Balls was joined by Eddie Izzard who presented some awards to school workers for their dedicastion to their jobs.  It was great to see front-line public service workers getting some public recognition.  Possibly they might have preferred the 6-figure bonuses that bankers get for doing a fraction of what they do, but I’m sure they appreciated the gesture.

Before each award there was a brief film, where the person who nominated them explained why, and there were some amazing stories, like the teaching assistant always going that little bit further than her job description, taking groups of students off forsite for a course they were interested in, in her own time, and never claiming for overtime.

The sad thing is that this is not unusual.  I know that Jayne puts in a lot of extra hours at her school, and many of her collegues do too. Going beyond the terms of their contract is actually the norm for most people working in schools and the shame is that only a few could be singled out.  Maybe we should extend Armed Forces day to include all public servants and make it a public holiday?  The trouble is that half of them would spend the extra day off doing preparation for lessons or supervising some extra-curricular school trip or something and defeat the purpose.

At the end of the session, Ed Balls made his speech, which was very strange.  He started off very well until at one point there was some spontaneous applause where he had not anticipated it.  Speaking without notes or autocue, Balls struggled a little to remember where he had got up to and had to repeat the last few words to get back on track.  After that he never really got back into it, speaking more hesitantly.  It was real edge-of-the-seat stuff: at each slightly-longer-than-it-should-have-been pause I wondered if he had forgotten the next line and was willing him to get it right.

Or maybe that was just my perception, remembering that it is like when you are in a play and have a long speech to do and suddenly go blank.  I may be over-sensitive to that sort of thing.  Certainly the content was spot-on.  He said some marvellous things about education workers and public servants in general.

Somebody who really did have trouble speaking was a young chap called Samuel.  He had been through a sports training scheme, during which he not only improved his sporting ability but was encouraged to participate in doing coaching himself and is now returning to education to further that ambition.  He was understandably overwhelmed by the size of the hall, number of people and cameras and the crowd loved him for it, egging him on and discreetly wiping away the odd tear as he explained his experience and thanked Charlton Athletic for the chances he has had.

Thanks Samuel for reminding us so effectively of the hundreds of human faces behind all the talk of various government schemes.

Another enjoyable speaker was the candidate for Reading West, who made me laugh lots.  He ended with a rallying call for the next election, telling the audience to clap, cheer and stamp your feet “because we are going to win, and I am going to be brilliant.”   For sheer cheek it can’t be beaten.

As I was leaving the hall, there was one last moment to savour during the emergency motion on Post Office pensions.  Billy Hayes had made a storming speech and then Tony Woodley, one fo the joint bosses of my union, got up to speak.  He held up a copy of today’s Sun and told us what he thought of it before flamboyantly tearing it up to massive applause.

I rounded off the day by having a coffee with the Crawley contingent of Laura Moffatt MP and her family and staff, joined temporarily by local councillor (and PPC for Reigate) Rob Hull before getting an earlier train home than I have all week.

Arrived at the station a 5 minutes before a train was due to leave, but my luck ran out when I just missed a No 20 bus at Three Bridges and had to wait 20 minutes for the next one, by which time I had walked halfway to town anyway.

This year's hot fashion tip

During the day I also bought myself a birthday present from Mother.  She had sent me a card with a cheque in it.

I would normally get myself some book or CD that I have had my eye on and then tell her what she got me, but right now I am trying to reduce the CD collection (or rather pack it up and put it in the loft) and have half a dozen books in the to-be-read pile so I used part of the money to buy this rather fetching t-shirt from the Labour stand.

As an added bonus, when I asked what sizes they had the chap said that they had aall sizes, adding “what do you want? A medium?”

Bless him.  Normally when I buy clothes the size tag has more Xs on it than a pools coupon.

I thought to myself  “what an ungodly hour to hold a meeting” and then was immediately struck by the appropriateness of the phrase and repeated it at every opportunity.  Andrew from Wongablog was there taking photos for them, and here I will take the opportunity to publicise what a nice bloke he is – he not only had a birthday gift for me and a card, but the card was a ‘Happy 30th Birthday” card.

It may have been a bad time of day for a meeting, but they had some decent coffee which perked me up a bit, and some very sugar-heavy pastries which helped too.  No way was I going to eat enough pastries to fill me up, but the sugar rush gave me a bit of much-needed energy.

After the event I went for a little walk around Brighton, ending up just down the road from the Komedia, where I found a little cafe willing to provide me with a proper breakfast or bacon, egg, tomato and toast.  This was my little birthday treat for myself.

Brighton Pavilion

If I was an official delegate I would have been back in the conference centre for briefings, votes and paying careful attention to all the debates.  Being ex officio means I can dip in and out and in this case I took my time getting back, going via the Pavilion and the seafront.

I got to the Brighton Centre in time to catch some of the debates, and enjoyed Jack Straw’s contribution more than I expected to, but enjoyed John Denham’s even more.

I was confused by the dubious housing Q&A session though.  There was a wide array of participants on the stage who all introduced themselves with a few words, leaving time for only a few questions from the floor but no time for answers, except for a generic speech from John Healey.

I am not saying this was without any merit or interest, but no way was it a question and answer session.

At lunchtime I went over the bridge and had a coffee and gossip with Bish and was unfeasibly chuffed to see Eddie Izzard there, marching through the room as if on a mission.

Before long it was time for the main event: the leader’s speech.  Getting into the hall was easy but finding a seat was more of a problem.  I ended up in a section right next to the media contingent, and with a few of them on our side of the aisle, so the atmosphere there was a bit muted.  Obviously the media are not going to be clapping, cheering and giving standing ovations along with everybody else.

Along with most members I was pleased with the speech, if not totally satisfied.  It ticked many boxes, even if it did miss out the box marked “scrap Trident” and in some areas did not go far enough.  It will do for me though.  Even where it didn’t go far enough I know it went further than the Tories would contemplate.

I’m a bit suspicious of the bit about ASBOs and support units for teenage mothers.  it reeks of pandering to the Daily Mail, but there were not enough details to know if it was entirely bad.  Support centres could be good if they were truly supportive and not like some sort of punishment for getting pregnant.

Lots of good things though:  re-instating the link between pensions and earnings (again no details, but in principle a good thing), getting rid of the House of Lords (including the Bishops presumably) and making the second chamber wholly elected, scrapping compulsory ID cards, national care service, protecting investment in schools, reaching the .7% of GDP target for overseas aid, and the getting an agreement on climate change at Copenhagen… lots of things that will make it a manifesto I will be a lot happier going out on the streets to promote.

The referendum on alternative votes is an interesting one.  Not the move towards proportionality that I personally favour and the rest of the party hates, but at least it is opening up the idea of electoral reform.

Giving constituencies a way to recall MPs is also an interesting idea.  Again there was no detail, but it sounds like a good move even if the way it was phrased hinted at all sorts of conditions and caveats being involved.  We will have to wait and see what the full proposal is.

I think the whole speech was well-received, as was Sarah Brown’s introduction.  Much more dignified than the cringeworthy introduction Alan Johnson got from Fiona Phillips.  That is surely destined to be a minor YouTube classic.

I have never understood why the leader’s speech is on day three.  It has such a focus on it that the rest fo the conference has a sense of anti-climax to it.  Each year as I watch bits on the conference on TV I wonder why the main event is in the middle rather than nearer the end.  Just one of many things about the conference that confuse me.

After the big speech I wandered teh exhibitions again, had a chat with the Computing for Labour people and generally enjoyed not being a delegate.  They were all still in the hall for delegate-only policy debates or something.

As the light faded, I took a stroll along the seafront and through the Lanes, had some chips on the seafront, and then headed for the pub to meet with some Labour blogger chums.  Wongablog Andrew was there, as was Bloggers4Labour Andrew, Jonathan from Assistant and his mate, and Pootergeek.  Bish and his colleague joined us and there were more downstairs, including Tom Hamilton.

Had a very good time catching up and chewing the fat, but left while the party was in full swing so I could get a train home.  I had a whole pint of lager top and a coke… boy do I know how to celebrate a birthday!

Got home to find some presents waiting for me.  Jayne gave me some filters for my camera.  I know I will be very tempted to go out on the beach tomorrow and experiment with my circular polarizing filters instead of hanging around the conference hall.

Peter Mandelson describing his plans for a Death Star to conference

A slightly late start for me.  I missed the absolute start of the day’s sessions so I missed the Scotland report and the first Welfare & Economy debate and the Economy Q&A.

I was in time for some rousing speeches from Yvette Cooper and Alistair Darling before lunch and also caught up with my school friend Bish briefly.  We said our hellos and went off to our different sections of the auditorium, with plans to meet up later.

At lunchtime I went off to a fringe meeting hosted by the New Statesman and UK Music about the state of the music industry, particularly about copyright issues and file-sharing.  Bish had already planned to go to something different and was kicking himself when I told him that Feargal Sharkey was one of the speakers.

Feargal Sharkey at the conference fringe

It was a well-attended meeting, with people from all different parts of the music business in the audience.  And it had food.  The meeting was hosted by the editor of the New Statesman and the two speakers were Feargal Sharkey and Ben Bradshaw – who has surely based his image on Hugh Grant.

I enjoyed the debate, and was interested to hear all parties refuting the suggestions that cutting off internet connections to filesharers is planned, though I doubt that will stop it being treated as gospel.

After this I trotted back to the Brighton Centre for the main event – Mandelson’s speech.  It was well-received and seemed to perk everybody up.  I think the feeling in the party is that whether you like him or not, you are glad that he is on our side.  I almost didn’t get in because I had won a prize on the Brighton Labour Party stall: a bottle of exotic and highly-flammable-looking booze (a cranberry liqueur based on sambucca) which the strewards wouldn’t allow in the hall. Very wise of them.  I stashed it on the Brighton stall for the time being.

After the masterclass in conference speaking from Mandelson, we had the Green Futures Q&A, which featured the prime ministers of Spain and Norway talking with Gordon Brown.  They were both very warmly received by the crowd as they both come from socialist parties and were full of praise for our party and for our PM.

After that I retreived my dangerous bottle and did a tour of the exhibitions.  First of all I blagged a carrier bag from the USDAW stall to put the bottle in, and they kindly filled it with free pens and sweeties.  I also took some membership forms since all three of our kids are in jobs that are covered by USDAW and would benefit from being members.

I had a go on a Wii sports on one stall, doing some ski jumping.  Can’t remember what it was in aid of, but I got a score that was only slightly better than David Lepper’s.  I also met a fellow Sussex PPC outside and had a nice chat with the people on the Iraq exhibition, where I got another free pen.

At the British Humanist Association stall I picked up some information about their ‘no prayer’ breakfast tomorrow and discovered that Andrew from Wongablog is coming down to take photos of the event.  Now I will have to make sure I get up in time.  I do hope he doesn’t  also try to start teaching everyone the Thriller dance.

After the main conference ended I went to a fringe meeting organised by mmy union, Unite, about protecting jobs.  According to a text from Bish he was off to a different meeting.  My fringe meeting was due to have Peter Mandelson speaking, so the room was quite packed with cameras.  I don’t think you usually get at least four TV camera crews at a fringe meeting.

At the start it was announced that Mandelson couldn’t make it.  The camera crews were very good though: they did not immediately pack up and leave – but I think they sneaked off as soon as it was polite to do so.

There was some good old-fashioned Labour/union rhetoric involved in this event, which went down well and made a lot of sense.  The recession/debt was not caused by teachers, nurses, refuse collectors so why should they be the ones who have to suffer to put it right?

When the meeting ended it was time for some more old-fashioned Labour opinions at the CND meeting concerning Trident.  By the miracle of SMS I found that Bish had been at a meeting in the Ship Hotel and was heading off somewhere else, though he did take the time to call me an old leftie for going to the CND meeting.

Grodon Brown at the diversity reception

Following the CND meeting I headed back to the Hilton Metropole for the party’s diversity reception, which I knew Bish was intending to go to.  I got there a bit early which was handy because the PM turned up right at the start and said a few words.

After that the free drinks and food were unveiled and there was a mad scramble.  It was all a bit claustrophobic and I decided to call it a day.

I made may way back to the exit and got there just as Bish was coming in on his way to the diversity reception. We had a few words, but will have to catch up properly tomorrow.

At some point in the day I got interviewed by a Spanish reporter, but I can’t remember exactly when.  I am finding that I can remember all the things that happened but have no idea what order they actually happened in.

Oe thing I can remember is that today was the day the Students Union from the local uni had organised a freshers pub crawl for the new intake of students, and there were hundreds of them.  They were all wearing ‘freshers pub crawl’ t-shirts of different colours.  You would pass one enormous crowd of red t-shirts and then see an equally large crowd in green t-shirts crossing the road.  Turn round the corner and there would be another crowd in purple t-shirts.

It made the streets of Brighton even more lively than usual, certainly more lively than you would expect for a Monday – the pubs were nearly as crowded as in Doncaster on a Monday night.  They were no trouble though.  Mind you, there are armed policemen at every street corner in Broghton at the moment which helps.

Lessons learned today were to choose fringe events that are listed as providing refreshments and get there early to grab some food before the event starts.   The only problem is that you are surviving on a diet of sandwiches, nibbles and sweeties from the USDAW stand.  I think that I will have to take time out to eat a proper hot meal tomorrow.

The Brighton Centre, venue for the 2009 Labour Party Conference

Well I finally made it to a party conference.  It is too early to know yet whether the conference is/will be a success for the party or for me.  I am still getting used to the whole thing.

As it is only down the road I am commuting, making use of the 20% discount I get on rail travel through the Easit scheme.   It does mean I can’t stay out late boozing, but that shouldn’t be a problem, except for Tuesday.  Taking the train also meant I could finally listen to the last Torchwood podcast that I had never got around to playing.I arrived a bit early and wandered round Brighton in the glorious sunshine for a while.  It really was a good day to be at the seaside: nearly the end of September and there were actual sunbathers on the beach!

Eventually I made my way into the ‘ring of steel’, negotiating the security with no trouble at all.  That was a bit of a relief, given all the various electronic stuff in my bag (camera, lenses, other accessories, other camera, binoculars, mobile phone, mp3 player, spare batteries for everything).  I didnt; really need all that stuff – just didn;t bother to take what I didn’t need out of the bag.

Outside the venue I was chatting to the chap who is replacing John Prescott.  To be more accurate, he is the candidate for JP’s seat at the next election – I don’t think anybody can actually replace Prescott as such.  I also bumped into quite a few people that I know from Crawley, Horsham and beyond.

Before the actual kick-off I had a look around the various exhibitions and had a chat with the party’s new media gurus.  They couldn’t sort out my problems loggin into Membersnet though. Have to try again tomorrow.

I was disappointed that the hall was quite empty with lots of vacant seats, but apparently that is normal for the Sunday.  I was told that it gets busier during the week.

Still not sure I understand what is going on all the time though.  For a start I didn’t know if I had to sit anywhere special.  My pass just said “Floor”.  It turns out there is a special section for ‘ex officio’ people so I sat there amongst the young, enthusiastic PPCs with their laptops and Blackberries, trying to hear the speeched onthe PA system over the sound of keyboards and Windows startup sounds behind me.

Gordon Brown at the 2009 Conference

There were some good speeches from Ed Milliband and Douglas Alexander, talking about the next election, and also from Rhodri Morgan giving his last address to the conference as Welsh Leader, who supplied the quote of the day about combining the mushy peas of old Labour and the guacamole of new Labour.

Douglas Alexander was talking about the approach to the next election, and Crawley was one of the constituencies he singled out for mention, praising the amount of campaignning work being done here.

At some point in the afternoon session I popped out for some fresh air and to give my buttocks a rest.  The seats in the Brighton Centre are quite unforgiving after about an hour.  I was reminded of going to mayoral functions and getting warned by the driver when an event was a two-hour one but with 30-minute furniture.

No sooner had I stretched my legs a bit than I got interviewed by the BBC.  I have studiously avoided any media training but follow my own strategy of giving responses so boring  or so long and unquotable that I won’t be used for transmission.  If I was in a marginal constituency I would have a different approach I guess.

I was asked what my message to Gordon Brown would be if he was standing in front of me.  I resisted the temptation to say ’scrap Trident and spend the money on more T45 destroyers, hospitals and budget deficit cuts’.

Instead I just said he should come to Horsham and meet with the people there.  It would be good to see him out in Horsham: a real fillip to the local party.  Of course, the BBC tried to twist that: “are you saying he is not visible enough?”.

Gordon Brown with the new intake of PPCs, possibly asking them what they want to do when they leave school.

I returned to the hall in time to see Antonia Bance and her colleagues in Oxford receive an award for their campaigning, and then there was a session where a load of PPCs sat up on the stage and had a question and answer session with Gordon Brown and Harriet Harman.

I watched this from the ex officio pen because I was not amongst the PPCs chosen to be on the stage.  Not sure why that is but the ones up there were all young, attractive, smartly-dressed and standing in winnable seats which may have something to do with it.

After the main session ended I was going to go to a BBC World Service reception I had been invited to, but the venue was somewhere not listed on the conference maps.  Rather than hunt for it, I ducked into the nearest fringe event.

This was a session about economics, in particular the prospect of a sustainable world economy.  It was a fascinating session and I am glad I went outside my comfort zone to attend it.  There was not a coherent policy as such, but lots of very interesting specific examples and the encouraging sight of the Chief Executives of the Institue of Chartered Accountants and the WWF collaborating.  Hilary Benn was also speaking, and they all appeared in agreement about the narrow-mindedness and ultimate futility of endless growth as an aspiration, and using GDP as the main criterion for success.

As soon as that finished I went upstairs to a reception for the South East Labour parties.  It was good to see a few more familiar faces, but by then I was suffering from a right headache – I don;t know if it was from all the speeches, the lights in the main venue, air-conditioning, the lack of food during the day or a combination, but I just wanted to go home.  So I did.

On the way, I nipped into a Tesco Express and got a bottle of water and some Paracetamol  + a sandwich.  By the time the train reached Crawley I was feeling OK again and ready for tomorrow.

I am now halfway to becoming a veteran.  I already know where to sit and to try and avoid sitting too close to the laptiop users.  I am undecided about whether to wear a suit or stick with the cargo trousers and t-shirt motif, but I am sorely tempted to take a cushion.

And while you are at it, can anybody tell me anything about the security policies regarding cameras?  I would quite like to have my big camera with me, even if only to use outside the conference itself or at events in the evenings.  Is there a problem taking a big bag with camera, spare lenses, batteries, etc. into the secure area?  I would hate to be stuck outside just because I have a camera bag, but similarly hate to get in there and find everybody else wandering about with SLRs and me with just a mobile phone!

I can’t bring myself to say anything about the show itself – I just get a mental image of Sadowitz doing his impersonation of somebody getting home after a show and writing a review on the internet…   Frankie seemed to enjoy it.  He has always lapped up all the stand-up comedy on TV and DVD but I don’t think he has ever seen a stand-up comedian live (going to see the Little Britain stage show doesn’t count) so I was quite pleased to be able to treat him to see a proper comic, especially one who ranked so highly in the poll of the top 100 comedians.  (Number 15.  I will be taking Jayne to see No. 41 later in the year)

What I don’t understand is why I don’t go to Brighton more often.  It is only just down the road, closer than the centre of London and easier to get to, wilfully bohemian and cosmopolitan, full of shops, bar, cafes and restaurants that don’t belong to a national chain.  Must make an effort to go more than once every couple of years.

Having said that, I’m going to the party conference in Brighton next month.  Maybe I’ll be sick of the place after several days of politics there.