When I mentioned The Planets by James Finney Boylan in a post about the film Silent Hill, it reminded me that I no longer own the book.
As a rule I try not to lend books for the reason that they never seem to get returned. A few years ago I was trying to stop being so uptight (It may have been the around the time I deliberately de-alphabetised my CD collection) and lent out this book to a girl at work. She had lent me a book (which I returned!) and when we were talking about books generally I mentioned The Planets and recommended it, then in a moment of rashness offered to bring mine in for her.
I thought it was a safe bet. She had a really long train journey and read a lot. I figured I would get it back within a week, and in any case her seeing me about the office would be a constant reminder.
So of course, she had a bit of a breakdown, went sick for about a year and left the company without ever returning, and still has the book. It is annoying, because although I read it twice, it is one I would probably read yet again. It is quirky, funny, and all the more fascinating through being based in a real place. Although I can’t remember the girl’s name any more, the absence of the book still grates.
Even longer ago I lent a book to a girl I was going out with for her kids to read. It was a kids’ book, based on Sherlock Holmes, which I only had because I used to collect anything related to Sherlock Holmes. After we broke up I realised she still had the book. I had a Ricky Gervais moment where I was tempted to try and get it back, even though it would have been petty and only just managed to see sense.
All of that reminds me… I think I lent another book to someone at work. I must try to get it back before I leave, but I can’t remember what it was. All I can remember is that we were on a train together more than a year ago and I had just finished the book that morning and was talking about how good it was. I offered to lend it as it was just weighing me down.
Since the lendee has probably lost it since then I am wondering whether I should try not to remember what it was. If I do remember I will just start brooding on it.
Book lending is a minefield. I can think of three times I’ve lent books – to people I’d known for years and trust completely. Two I never saw again, and the third I only got back because the borrower was my flatmate at the time and when he was moving out last year it was in the ‘leftover random stuff’ pile.
I try never to borrow books myself, for fear that people will take the same attitude to me if I take a bit too long with it. If ever someone insists I borrow a book they’ve read that I’ve expressed an interest in, I feel compelled to read and return it immediately.
I probably need to chill out a bit…
I leant my favourite Woody Allen audio tape to a business partner. Two weeks later he absconded to the States leaving our business hanging. Eventually I bought it on CD – but it doesn’t have as much material on it as the tapes (4). I’m not that bothered at all that he buggered off to America without a word, but I do miss those tapes!
I try not to borrow books either.
As far as lending goes, some people like books, whether for noble intellectual reasons, artefact fetish or plain pretension, and like to keep them. Others will read a book and then throw it away or give it to the local charity shop. If they read a borrowed book it might not even occur to them that you want it back.
The rule of thumb is not to lend books to anyone who likes them less than you do.