People who know me well will know that I am a sucker for advance proof copies of books, and I am fortunate to be able to get one most months. Last month I got two. One was a 100-page novella which took hardly any time to read, the other is more substantial and I grabbed it because I liked the title: Alice in Zombieland.

Now I have it in my hands I realise that it isn’t actually about the Lewis Carrol Alice, just a girl called Alice who has a runin with zombies. No problem. I like zombies. By the way, it appears that there is another book with an identical title that is about the Lewis Carrol Alice, and it looks terrible judging by the reviews. There is also yet another book of the same title that is also not about the Lewis Carrol Alice. It is a busy markey out there for books with ‘Alice’ and ‘Zombieland’ in the title!

I also discovered that the book I have is supposedly a teen novel. That might not be a problem. It is a teen novel written by a woman with a 16-year-old girl as the main character. I am trying to be positive. It might still be OK and not entirely aimed at a target audience I am not in at all. I am trying to keep an open mind and not weigh myself down with preconceptions. I’m sure it will be OK.

Page 1. A whole page of dedications that starts with:

First and foremost I have to thank God

Not a good sign. This could be a really long 416 pages.